as we are both off living our separate lives, we exchange snippets of communication throughout the day. sometimes the snippets just seem to ignite the embers still burning from the snippet before. perhaps my fire just never dies down.
i find myself lost in thoughts of you as i go about my daily activities: laundry, cleaning and other misc household duties. i wonder how many times i cleaned that same spot on the counter? how many times did i wash my hair when i was in the shower?
wherever i walk, you walk with me. wherever i sit, you sit with me. wherever i lay, you lay with me.
if you were here, we would throw our obligations out the window and take a “vegetable day.” we’d live on the edge of danger. throw caution to the wind. pretend like we were young again, and had nothing to lose. live in the moment…where memories are made.
in the world that i have created for us, you would walk in my front door, push me up against that wall…and give me my new perfect kiss (outdoing my now ranking perfect kiss…which is not you). you know the type i am talking about. a kiss that makes your head go empty, your knees literally buckle and everything around you, but you, cease to exist. it’s passionate. it’s greedy. it takes no prisoners-you’re either in or out. and baby, i’m all in.
in the movie world we would then somehow manage to passionately kiss as we smoothly flowed down the hallway to the room where you would elegantly take me in. in REAL life, the only movie-like moments would be that kiss…the ways we look at each other…and the sweet nothings we would whisper in each other’s ears. all of those would be oscar-worthy, because the way you look at me now, sometimes, feels like it’s straight out of a movie. depending on the day…the genre changes: horror, comedy, drama, romance…
making love off and on all day would probably happen, with frequent naps and long breaks in between. again, let’s be honest. but i am confident in our abilities. we could hold our own and give my bed a run for it’s money. although, there’s no quarter slot. ha ha-remember those beds?
spending the uninterrupted time together would be what fills my soul with joy and my heart with love. spending uninterrupted naked time together would be what fills me with you. both needs need met. you, my darling, are the one whose name is written on all of those parts…so they wait for you.
it’s sunday which means we can watch football together. we have the packers in common so that means we were fated to be. packers’ rule. i think what i’ll enjoy most is hearing your laugh. your beautiful, one of a kind, laugh. seeing your perfect smile. and what i anticipate most is watching your eyes change when your body fills with desire for me…and the blood slowly flows south…your breathing becomes heavy. yes. a “vegetable day” is what i want.
i just want more time with you. time. it’s what everyone wants when you reach a certain age. i only want more time if it is spent with you. i have had my fill of time elsewhere.
elsewhere. that is where i have to go now, e. i will be back later to talk with you. perhaps i will speak of things with a bit more substance then.
i love you.